Labels: praying for healing

A few days never blog.

Now I down with a minor flu.

Seeking healing not only from God but from some drink that will cool my heaty-ness down.

Hope to get well very soon.

Thanks God for making things possible.

Has been wanting to go but as my mind is asking me what about CGM, I reasoned with myself and ended up agreed to go for CGM.

Yet my heart said otherwise.

Pondering me.

I prayed and really want to go.

A few of my SOT friends came and asked me over the Indonesia Night and I really wanna to go yet I can just pray for God to show me a way.

God is faithful

Like 2 years ago when I struggled between a vision given by my mentors and a vision given by God, it is till a group of missionaries from different part of the world that gathered together in SG and through my leader, I met them and shared of my burden and visions.

Really God always keep His words.

I prayed over it, Bobby came and urged us to go and it is so overwhelming that I cried.

Missions missions missions...

I dream of it, think of it, whatever thing I do, I just can't forget about missions.

Lord, let this be a small beginning.

Where You will direct me.

Where I won't be relying on myself but You.

Holy Spirit, be my personal Guide.

Tonight, let me received a vision from You about Indonesia.

Prepared my heart God...

Labels: Missions

It took an earthquake to resurrect the vision of mine for missions.

It took my spirit to groan out for me to know why God always placed this deep burden within me whenever I saw a disaster.

When I was Sec 1, for the 911 incident, I was so hitted in my soul that for many days and weeks and even months, I had been going around, asking people to email, smsing and asked people to pray for those who survived and those who died. I was a non-believer then, but the sadness of seeing so many people died at one go, made me cried for days for the victims and continued to chase after the news even when people stopped talking about it.

When I had gotten saved, for my 1st Christmas with God, I received news of the biggest tsunami that had happened during Christmas season, I was so hit in my soul and spirit that I prayed everyday for the nations, cried everyday while reading news and even deciding to enroll into Nursing course because of the burden within me to really wanna equipped myself so that in future when disaster happened, I can be of some helps.

Now finished my course and enrolled into SOT, I received news of the earthquake in China that already killed 20,000 people, and with 60,000 people missing and uncontactable. Many students died in the earthquake and overnight, many parents lost their beloved child, be it their only child or all the children they had, overnight, every things are gone and a deep burden felt upon me.

I wondered who can I share?

I wondered who I can confine in.

When someone interpreted the tongue and said she saw a vision of someone having many people standing behind, I was trembled. It is way out of the interpretation for family issue, the world has become my family from the moment when my soul groaned for the lost souls and those who died.

It took an earthquake to awaken that vision of mine to be a missionary.

And all I can do now is to pray and pray till there is an open door while I fulfill whatever I am to fulfill in Singapore.

Maybe before I came to Christ, God already planned for me to carry this vision for nations. Now to think back, every tears I shredded, every passion I had, it wasn't for nothing.

I wondered when will the time come for me to be away.

But I know for now, I got to tarry for as long as I can.

I don't care what the world think now.

God, as I rely on God, show me where to head to.

I don't want to rely on my own strength and forget about my vision.

Life is short.

I wonder when Jesus is coming back but yet many haven't heard of Him.

Let me be one of those who is in the world outside, preaching the good news.

Evangeline = Good News.

Maybe I am called to be an Evangelist after all.

I got to be even more equip then ever before if I wanna to fulfill my calling.

Labels: Awaken

I got so much books to read.

Bible, spiritual-filled believers and many more.

Wow, becoming a bookworm...

Yet after all, I just wanna said, I thanks God for wonderful mum and dad.

My dad is getting loving toward me and would often come in and ask how am I?

My mum is trying her best to ensure I don't get financial overwhelmed and all she said was, just ensure when I go out and work, I will give her some allowance which I will for that part of honoring your mother and father.

I just prayed to God that as I endure through the remainder 3 months and 3 weeks, my life will not only change tremendously but everything around me will experience changes.

While I getting heighten up on reading books, but I thanks God that He still there to guide me, bless me and comfort me.

Now I must really work hard, read hard and apply all that I learn and receive into my life.

It's reading time!

May God give me more wisdom. may Holy Spirit be there to guide me and may Lord Jesus showed me more about His goodness as I live my life by faith. Amen!

Labels: Reading

Waited for a voice and I found many voices.

I searched for the Lord's voice in the back of my mind, but 2 voices appeared.

I felt the peace in my heart to listen and I finally once again go back to the promise.

Yes!

My Lord never fails me.

He never fails to keep His promises.

Yes, just 1 year and 8 months to go.

After a time of restarting the journey with God...

Now is the time to taking the promise and walk even stronger with God again.

For the next few years till my 22nd birthday, I'm excited to see what is coming my ways.

Many times has been coming in place and I know my God is never too late.

I seeing my visions coming closer to me.

Talents being multiplied.

And I more open to learn from people around me.

I'm awaiting the promise of God and I shall not lose heart.

It's a time of tally with God.

Labels: Awaiting Promise

Nothing compared to bounce back from obstacles.

After a conversation with Pearly and gotten a listening ear, I felt much better since I always wanna to find someone to talk to whenever I got sad, happy things to share.

It isn't easy definitely.

Cliff said it before.

Victor said it before.

Hui Jun said it before.

Even Michelle said it before.

More obstacles, more mountains to climb.

Yet with God, with His strength, I can overcome all things in life.

Now it seem like the prophesy is becoming more and more real to me.

Now it is no longer diluted chances.

But it is a true warfare.

Now to think back, I choose to give a different respond.

Even since the times I "divorce" the devils from my life, from direct attacks, to using my close ones to attack me, it showed me that he is only as stupid as to come up with the same tactics every single time I just mentioned a vision.

I glad that I got support with me.

It is not easy.

Cause human are imperfect.

But at least I know.

Through it all, I got God to hold on to.

And people who support me.

I bouncing back! Thanks God for His grace and mercy.

And now, to end it off, for SOZO EXTREME CAMP!

I will be taking leave.

And I was surprised when being asked to be the AOGL for another CG.

They in need of a AOGL and my PCGL thought of me and asked me.

That when I choose to take leave.

I had been praying for God to show me a way whether I should take leave.

Now I can take leave with a peaceful heart.

For at first, schooling is important to me, yet I can't decide for myself till I leave it for God to decide for me.

God is indeed good.

To think I got sent out to help my friend's CG, and to think, when thinking of who to send for, my PCGL suggested to the committees to send me.

Now, if only one day when the leaders think of who to send out to missions and they would think of me.

That what I told Pearly and we all laughed.

Cause that is my dreams and she AMEN with me.

We start things small.

And I start things small.

God give the promotion and increase while we do our part to be faithful with the little.

I coming with a different attitudes now.

God, guard my heart.

I shall become a strong woman in Christ my Lord

Labels: Bouncing Back

I might have know this for long, but I found that the devils super dislike me.

Through people I know especially, the devils seek to find a loophole to attack my heart if I fail to guard my heart.

I never know I must really guard over my heart.

For the words of discouragements and rejections really come one after another especially when I regain my visions.

Everytime happened after a vision.

Now I know how much the devils hate my visions.

Just a vision, haven't seem the works yet and the devils make sure he can find a loopholes in my heart.

Now I gonna pray even more, especially in my secret place with God to ensure by the times I come out, I will be different.

Much more different.

Many lives is in my hands.

Through the visions I saw.

I wanted so much to hold it even tightly and I don't know how sensitive I am toward it till I am being challenge again and again in this area.

Now I will be much careful.

I shall not turn back and would not turn back, no matter how much it pain me.

I might try to smile with all my might but I shall seek back the joy of the Lord and I will keep it within me.

It is the intense moments of warfare.

And I will reign victoriously with Jesus.

Labels: Intense Moments

Suddenly I realised, this is the me that is awaiting to be released.

A me that is looking forward to the world.

A me that is wild.

A me that is not as young-looking as the me that people is used to.

It took me with a determined heart, waited for 2 whole hours, to see the me that is different.

Remind me of the times I snipped my hair away under the hands of a female hairstylist.

This time, I tried something different and it is a male hairstylist who do that for me.

Wow...

I think it must be his first time trying the hairstyle I required for he was sweating badly under a air-conditional condition.

Many hairstylists came by to take a look at my hairstyle and I was so shy, and could only smile while praying for my hair.

It was fine and with an urge and I went and took out a bottle of hair dye that I kept and never dare to try and guess what, I did it!

It is the same hair color as my previous hair color when I still had my short hair about 1 year ago.

I happy with new look.

It look more like me.

Thanks God letting me receiving advice.

Many and including some brothers said I should have my old hairstyle but this ex-friend aka also a brother told me not to cut it and even many female hairstylist didn't even dare to snip my hair away.

I mean, should I be heart pain?

If the previous hairstyle doesn't make me look sharp.

This one surely make me look better and more confident.

I dare to say, this is the me that the ex-N266 saw me as.

The me that when my leader saw me, he knew I was different and through God, I received a promotion.

Now I awaiting for my destiny to unfold.

Maybe I will grow my hair out a little bit more but yet I will keep it there.

Be ready devils!

Evangeline is on her way to fight back!

Labels: Being Me

I thanks God for never abandon me.

It is by His grace that I am still around, learning to love Him even more every single day and continue to follow the ways He gave me.

Yes, too many round-about.

He gave me many chances.

Someone told me today, every new chance caused our destiny to turn a little bit.

And how many diluted chance do I hope to get?

I now don't want to think of the possibilities of God keep on giving me chance.

I now only want to think about how to follow Him closely so that I can ensure I am in His path and walk the ways He want me to walk.

Many things I don't seem to grab even right now.

But I questioned too much in the past.

I asked too much people in hope that I can receive an answer and now I realized, I already got the answer and I had seem breakthrough before, and now?

It is just a higher level of breakthrough.

Yes, God spoke and I just listen.

My destiny is mine to create.

And God is there for me to lean on.

I can't expect things to turn out perfectly well for me.

Yet I can be assured that as long as my God is with me, I shall have no worries.

Labels: Destiny

Today I once again feeling so emotional.

It felt like something is breaking with me.

I can't grab the feeling and I wondered why?

Did it got to do with some articles that I came across the previous night or is it got to do with my spirit, soul and body?

I can breaking apart under the power of God.

I can moving ahead in a more faster pace than ever before.

It is not easy and I don't expected it to be easy but I pray from now on that may the Lord guard my heart and thought strictly so that I can fulfill that wonderful vision of God.

Start with a capacity of 50-60 and ultimately, within the next 5 years, have a capacity of 1000 people.

Grabbing on, is the anointing of God.

I want His wisdom, His anointing yet most of all, I want more of Him.

It is a breaking process and I glad that I am allowing myself to be broken so that I can has an even more intimate relationship with God.

Labels: Breaking

Being in SOT is really different.

Dwelling in His presence never seem to be enough.

Sharing and receiving revelations from one another are even awesome than I can ever imagine.

Even if the person sharing isn't a leader or being in ministry as long as me, yet when God speak, He really speak in ways we can't imagine.

Listening to a friend sharing and lending a listening ear really is very different from just talking and talking.

I learn to slow down my heart and pace and listen to the voice of God and at the same time move in the gifts of God.

It is wonderful to learn to be relational rather than task-oriented.

And for the whole day, I was so excited cause I got a feeling that it won't be the end of this.

If God wanna break me, so be it!

I wanna be different and I wanna be the Evangeline that God called me to be.

My heart yearns for You, my soul longs for You.

Now going for my bible reading and then once again spending times with God.

Tomorrow got school, follows by some free time for me to fellowship and then sit in Michelle's P&W practice.

So happy that I can finally sit in.

The last time I sit in, was Hui Jun's P&W which is 8 months ago. She asked me to join her and observed the ways she led P&W and she gave me a vision.

Now I understand why I am being place at where I am.

No matter how many times I shared this, I will never get tired for God really got His timing and when it is the right season, opportunities will find it ways and now I just see glimpse of it.

Last time, I was so unsure and so blur.

Now, I am different, for my God shall give me the strength to do the things I never do before.

Labels: Strength

Learning about worship stirred my heart to move up to the next level and learn to be a worship leaders.

Before I can ever think of being a leader, I must first be a worshipper that usher down the presence of God upon this earth.

I only left 4 months to reach for the vision that God once placed within me.

It all started with a dream and went deeper as a leader turned to me and said "see you on stage one year from now."

It started with just a word, just a vision and now it turned into a passion.

I never was someone musically incline, yet I know if I am willing, I can release the anointing that is within me.

It is not about technique but is about engaging the people and bringing them into the holies of holy.

Tomorrow I going to sit in for zone practice for Praise and Worship and I am so excited.

Thanks God for opportunity.

Thanks God for the chance and encouragement that You gave me.

And thanks God for speaking through people that build up my faith to take the first step into an area that I only dream of yet never been able to try.

God already planned for my CG to be small so that I can use this opportunity to grow with the rest of the people and to learn things that I never do before.

I really moving to the next level.

And this time, I got others with me.

Labels: Next Level

It has came to me...

Did I make the decision because of people or because I really wanna to go for it?

At first I heard of it, I wanna to go for it so much and then after seeing someone, made me wanna choose it even more and yet I also wanna go many other places too.

I wondered, what to think of my decision?

I just wanna put aside everything for now, and locked everything and then continue to fulfill what I want.

Staying silent and fulfilling what I wanna to do is better than looking at people and get affected.

It happened too many times for me, no matter who they are, I now no longer can think much for my mind is not disciplined in the ways that I want.

I wanna to take back the decision for people said I do that because of this and that but now I think back, taking away all distracting factors, I will still choose it no matter what.

Now what?

Nothing, I need to empty my mind so that I can finally know the path my Shepherd give me.

My mind too mess up by the words of many people.

Now, I need to settle down my mind again and think for myself, what is my passion again?

What I really want?

And what I hope to achieve?

I still a human, and weaknesses is still with me no matter what people viewed of me.

But I got strengths and now I need to focus on my strengths.

This remainder 4 months is precious to me.

It determine my path.

I just need to make sure I am not losing focus.

No matter what, I can't make decision based on feelings but based on God.

I got to learn to extract myself from many voices and ultimately learn to hear the voice of God.

Decisions, I learning to make the right ones.

Labels: Decision

A bit sad when I looked at the modified courses.

I discovered that we won't be study the book of Daniel and Revelations.

For me who loved these 2 books, I am a bit down.

Yet I told myself, nonetheless SOT is still good and I can still pray for them to change the courses to include these 2 books.

Talking about this 2 books reminded me of a conversation I had with a friend from NYP cluster.

Also knowledgeable in theology.

Thanks God for sending people like that, for now I can raise up anything and we can discuss.

Which I seldom able to do so especially after my last BS class with Gabriel.

It is not easy to find people who are knowledgeable in theology.

I still wanna learn in details about Daniel and Revelations.

Though I gonna learn about Christology and Theology too.

Which are also the subjects that I waiting for.

Pray pray pray!

Have Daniel and Revelations study!

Labels: Prayer

Coming into SOT is not my actual breakthrough.

Receiving a new hp and laptop is not my actual breakthrough.

My actual breakthrough is what I going to experience in the next few weeks to next few months of study in SOT.

Getting the chance to lead Praise and Worship for mock CG caused my palms to sweats.

I mean, I was a long time game mistress, able to preach in 7 minutes (All helpers need to train in this area), testimony still okay, offering not bad...

BUT I NEVER TRIED TO LEAD PRAISE AND WORSHIP!

To us, the stages to rising up all started with games (I led games for one whole year), testimony and offering (after CG multiplied then I was promoted to this area), then before reaching leadership, is praise and worship then followed by the word of God when you are a full-fledge CGL.

Thus I always believe, maybe in future I will do it but I never thought, God will let me do these 2 areas at one go.

My eyes went o.o and I can't help but wondered what going to happen. Now all it left is the preparation with the guitarist which high chance I will find Brendan to help me.

Am I getting a step closer to where I wanna be?

I do not know.

But I know it is a good ground for me to breakthrough.

2 more days to mock CG.

God, help me!

Only You can do a miracle, especially when I know nothing about praise and worship.

Only You can give me wisdom!

Like King Solomon, I need to pray and seek for wisdom in the Lord.

I'm breaking through into another realm.

Labels: New Realm

When shall I fully understand the plans of God?

Up till now, it is still a mystery for me.

Things happened unexpectedly.

Emotions arise beyond what I expected.

What can I expect now but for a move of God.

Soaking in His presence is what I ask of now.

To put aside earthly vessel and turned my eyes upon the Lord.

I always seeking for an answer to everything in life and now, I put aside all seeking and pull myself to seek the One who has the answer.

Life is not easy, neither will it be tough.

Life is just difficult in those unpredicted moments.

And life is just easy to live with when everything goes according to what you want it to be.

But all I want now is to go pass this stage of hard-pressing and become a fine oil for God to use.

This earthly vessel of mine, I leave it for God to decide what He wanna to do with it.

I lived long enough with God to know that certain situations in life is beyond what I asked for.

Forget about just seeking for answers.

Focusing on seeking the One who has the answer.

Labels: Seeking

Just had a conference with Pearly and Elijah.

I must said God do way beyond my expectation.

Having a stomachache, enduring the pain and continued the prayer conference with Elijah, I thought that that is the end of the day, but God sent Pearly and we had a conference that lasted for 45 mins.

Pearly shared with us what Cliff thought about us and how we had all changed and as I listened, I felt like tearing for the words came from a leader who witnessed the growth and struggles I went through in leadership and the decisions I made in life. He was a leader who I always honor his decision for me for he was someone who I viewed as my father and I always remembered Hui Jun said to me about having a father-child relationship.

Yes, it is like a warfare to me recently.

Pearly passed through the stage.

And now I believing in my breakthrough to come.

I know it is not going to be easy.

For the Lord never said it will be a smooth road.

It really touched my heart to hear that the changes that occurred in Elijah and I is slowly showing out.

Pearly was so funny when she gave a challenge to Elijah.

He is to be able to lead men age range from 20-23 in the next few months time.

And I will play a role.

He is suppose to use me as a guide and dress like he is my age.

Mind you, he is only 16 years old now.

Though sometimes I found him looked old. (When he is in a formal wear)

So I kept on laughing and laughing.

I even said that I looked so young, why used me as a rough guide?

But I feel honor.

To all friends not from GT zone, if in future, you ever saw someone looked around my age walking beside me, mind you, he might be my co-worker, Mr. Elijah Xu. Pearly and I shall make sure he evolve to be mature-looking than now. No t-shirt for him anymore. Though wearing suit is a bit too much but if he feel that how he can look mature... Hahaha...

Rest of the conversation leave it for private chatting and joking.

Good night to all.

And lastly, thank Hui Jun for the short msn conversation.

As always, I missed talking to her. But it was great to hear that all leaders are going up to another new level. I must chased up soon.

Can't stay at the same place and expect to see results.

Must move on so that I will receive an even greater result.

Labels: Beyond Expectation

Imagine, if I just pray a pray and carried the faith to believe it can come to pass, how much more can't my heavenly Father restricted Himself from me?

Remembering the days when I obeyed His voice and raised up my building fund amount and deciding to let go of the thoughts of changing a new Hp and laptop and entering into SOT and just 1-2 months before SOT, God blessed me with all that I wanted through my parents.

From a non-sponsor, to a sponsor, I walked down the path that my leaders once walked and just as they once said, the anointing flow from top to bottom and I thanks God for giving me the anointing even though my school fees is not sponsored but the rest of my necessity, through one way or another, is covered.

Recently Benjamin suddenly talked to me and offered a job to me after SOT ended. I still praying to see which path God want me to take. I was surprised for I just told God to show me an opportunity and it came just went I thought of it.

For years, I already realized how a thought toward the Lord turned into a prayer and beside I haven't see my destiny unfold, I had already witnessed miracles in my life when God answered to my desires when I placed His will above me.

When it came to me as a revelations, I'm realized, if that what God can do for me, imagine when I turned my attention to the souls out there. What else God can't do!

Pray till something happened!

It is a new dedication from now on.

To pray more than usual.

To imagine more than usual.

The souls that would enter into the venue of CG and services.

Yes, it will happen!

This year will be the year of greater breakthrough!

Labels: Prayer

A day of Sabbath, a day where I think back the past 1 week and reflected on myself, and a day of being emotional than usual.

It is a day, when I like to be alone and goes into my own thoughts and to do my own stuffs without much interaction with people, beside msn and sms.

Yes, I only managed to accomplish 50% of what I want to do. 50% more to go.

A while back, I was doing admins and suddenly I thought back to the day when I was spiritual birthed into the Kingdom of God. Followed by it, I tried to remember the day I went for baptism. For a moment I wondered, which year is it? Surprisingly I could remember the date, but I forgot the year.

Searching deep within my mind, I still can't remember and all I could do is to look for an envelop where I carefully kept my certificate along with a few others letters and certs.

Searching through it, I found a letter written by Cindy when CG newly multiplied last year.

It was a letter long forgotten, and kept neatly in the envelop.

Curiously, I read through the letter for I forgotten what is the content about and whenever I got a letter, I will read it and kept in nicely in my envelop and letter box, as I love to receive letter from my loved ones, and considering the fact that I'm not born to be artistic in writing, when people wrote me letter, I will be very touched for all I always do is to make something or buy something for them.

As I read something, I came across something that touched me deeply.

"Somehow I feel you are someone who's covered by a lot of God's grace."
It got me puzzled at first, for shouldn't we all being covered by His grace? If I am covered by "a lot of God's grace", shouldn't I called myself Grace instead of Evangeline?

Yea as I pondered further, I realized, the Lord has really and continues to be good to me.

I wasn't called Grace for He already covered me with His grace even during moments when I hardened my heart.

I am called Evangeline for my name symbolized who I am to become.

"A messenger of God"
I am not called into God's grace, blessings and love only.

I am called to be in world missions and being part of the warriors in the kingdom of God to share of His goodness.

I am covered by His grace so that I can be totally pure in His presence.

For all have sins and fallen short of the glory of God.

Without His grace, my sins couldn't be forgiven.

And I believed, the grace He has given to me, led me out of my past totally.

For the devils will use it to stop me from moving, but God's grace will propel me to move on.

Yes, my God is a wonderful Father.

Labels: Thoughts

Before I go and sleep, I really wanna thanks the fellowship. Knowing that my youths might not see this.

Really missed you guys, seeing you guys gotten saved and ultimately, after just seeing you guys gotten saved while I was at the tertiary side, after which, I was placed with the youths again.

It was a great time with you guys, we went through happy moments, sad moments, touching moments.

We shedded tears of joy together, seeing people leave and came back to the LORD, and we saw people who never came back, yet through all those tough times, we built up strong bond.

Surely as it is, even when we spent lesser time together and with the remainder E457 youths, we are going to grow the CG again, this time, only with the west people.

After a special vowing, we are officially, coming back to EXPO for service, wohoo....

People asked me how come our CG transferred so much, but it is just a season for us to discover our destiny.

Now our destiny is to create be a prayer group that pray and reach out to friends and family.

We are still the same fun loving fortified servant, with brand new much of youths.

We are moving forward, not backward and even if we started small, we will end up big.

Faithful with the little and God will give us much.

New E457 jia you!

We will really fulfill all that we believe and have faith for.

Labels: Yeah

Finally I'm home after a long day. Decided to make tomorrow my Sabbath day, need to really give my body a good rest for yet another week.

Impacted during prayer group today as we gave a word and prayed for one another. Yes, Cell Group is no longer called Cell Group at this moment. Gabriel decided to change it to prayer group and for the past 2 weeks, we had been praying and really tapped into God's presence like never before.

Ps. 119:1-3 [NLT]
1 Joyful are people of integrity,
who follow the instructions of the Lord.
2 Joyful are those who obey his laws
and search for him with all their hearts.
3 They do not compromise with evil,
and they walk only in his paths.

I believed, as we walked in the ways of God, no matter in our own personal life to our public life, as long as we walked in joy in purity, God will do much more for us and make sure we will always be in His ways.

It is as in all the had been happened, were there to not only strengthening me but to preparing me for the next level.

It is near, I know it.

Maybe I knew it long time ago, but the pressure of people caused me to wanna rush God.

But God is never too late, and never too early.

I know when the time come for my vision to be fulfill, it will happen at the right time.

I just got to be more patient, more enduring and most of all, learn to be a good shepherd.

I am charged for another new day, another new week.

The destiny is coming one day closer.

Labels: Charged

I can't believe I only catch 1-2 hrs of sleep last night.

What has happened to the weather recently?

I was tired to the core after stayed awake up way past my normal sleeping time, then the minutes I laid down, my whole body was aching.

I turned and turned on my bed, trying to catch some sleep but failed. Leaving with no choice, I turned to the next resolve, my beloved sofa in my room. It was my makeshift bed and yesterday afternoon, I had been spending at least 2 hrs on the sofa sleeping to replenish myself of the sleep I prevented myself from having so that I can reach school early.

Oh my, I couldn't even sleep on my beloved sofa. =X

So in the end, I ended up on my bed again, this time too tired to turn anymore and finally I forced myself to sleep.

But by the time I woke up, only 1-2 hrs had passed and I got no choice but to force myself to go took a shower.

Amazed at how for the whole day at school, I could be so awake.

No one knew I didn't really sleep well beside Lexx, Kai Yun and Brendan. Being the first one to reach school, I think those times I spent outside of the premise allowed me to take some time to read my bible and to replenish myself for the lesson afterward.

Come to think of it, sitting at the front is good and coming early just paid off the effort of killing my flesh.

From someone who at first felt that don't need to come super early, to someone who now promised Abba to come early, God is still good to me despite a few circumstances I encountered.

Most of all, today I got back my headphone.

Being careless, I accidentally dropped my headphone in the hall. Never thought someone will pass it to the reception. Thanks God for answering praying. Every single day I had been telling God that I believed somehow He will bring back my headphone, even if it is not bad, I insisted not to buy a new one till I finished SOT since buying new one mean need to fork out more money that is not necessary at this moment.

Every spending got a price to pay.

I just wanna make sure I paid it for a good cost.

My body continued to function even when my mind was half gone.

Helping Li Fen with some admins, and in the end, managed to finish everything for her, plus got Lexx's eyes helped to check the data I done.

I must said, knowing the stage I was in, I better do the typing and Lexx handled the reading and lo and behold, when Li Fen checked out work and asked me to help read some names, I saw the wrong name and read wrongly and both of us were shocked for a moment than discovered, I saw the wrong name.

Li Fen asked how come I didn't wear spectacle, so in the end said I forget and admitted being sleepy-headed. (Actually I took it out when I changed a new bag then left it on my table. So considered forgotten about it. =P)

Talked to Lexx about thinking whether should pick up a job or not. Cause Lexx adviced me to do so even if I got saving and I got a few options to ask of. But I really need wisdom, I don't wanna make a wrong move and miss out on the move of God. Detour is not fun at all, and most of all, it is draining. How many times in life I made a detour just to reach where I am. I just wanna make sure I walk in the peace of God.

Then after which, really must be God planned for me to meet Angela.

I missed my bus when I reached interchange. (I purposely missed it cause too pack plus I was too tired to stand for half an hour. So I was thinking of taking the next one. That was 6.30pm that time.)

Turned out, Angela wanna asked me to wait for her as she got a visitation to go and we could travel together. I was happy for I got to fellowship with someone again. (Accompanied people becoming part of my life already. Either people got some ways to convince me to take time to travel with them or I followed them so that can fellowship more, either way, even if I wanna to chat, turned out, it is good to hear people chatting.)

So in the end, I insisted waiting for her as her bus took a long time to reach the interchange.

Had a nice time accompanied her and a new friend also wanna to meet me.

So in the end, went to find the new friend, spent sometimes talking to her and took my time to walk home and allowing myself to feel the wind.

How long had it been since I ever walk the road from my secondary school to my house?

I can't really remember.

By the time I was home, it was 8.30pm.

Drained physically, yet in all other aspects, it was still a fulfilling day for me.

Now is finally the time for some rest.

I must catch up with the sleep that I had missed out last night.

I still feeling a bit diao when during the 1-2 hrs of sleep, I got a dream. =X

I told Lexx, I wanna do dream interpretation since Daniel also knew how to do it.

Nearly got a knock on my head as usual. =X

But before I forgot, I today saw a "loving" brotherly scene of Brendan and Joel eating a sandwiches while Lexx and I waiting for Li Fen to give us some works.

And there was another funny moment when a few guys and I crowded around the AXM machine to trying to figure the way to submit our school fees.

Why so funny?

Cause we are like blur turkey. Trying to use all ways to figure the machine, plus the guy using the machine looked younger than Joel and we laughed when the guy is younger than him. =X

At least Joel got a forgiving heart for I kept on laughing and nearly earned a knock on the head from Lexx.

Missed Pearly, she had been sick for a week.

And all sisters were away except me, a sister among the bunch of "brothers".

Am I their brother?

Or are they my sister?

I think I must be very tired to type random stuffs like that.

SOT is fun, being spiritual is one thing.

Build strong friendships is another thing.

Meet nice people and not so nice people also another thing.

There are lessons to be learned everyday.

I better go rest.

Or else my brain will be gone. =X

Keep me awake Lord.

Tomorrow going for expo service again.

Hoping to get nice seats again for everyone. =)

Labels: Resting

Someone asked me a question today, "how to become a pillar in the house of God."

My answer is Rev. 3:12.

He who overcomes
Sometimes, we neglected the fact that to be a pillar, is not that hard.

Yes, to endure trials and tribulations are hard.

To wait for the promises to come to pass is hard.

But to overcome them is even harder yet at the same time, not as complicated as we think it is.

I know I sound confusing.

Not as simple yet not as difficult as it sound?

Yes, that what I had been saying.

You might scratch your head and wonder, what do I mean?

The answer is very simple.

Endured through the pains of suffering (long suffering), be patient for the promises and you will see yourself overcoming all obstacles in life.

One key to being a pillar in the House of God is to never GIVE UP!

The minutes you give up, you can be assured, none of your promises will come to pass, at least not coming to pass in the period when you are away from God.

You will start to see your promises coming to pass bit by bit when you are in the PRESENCE OF GOD.

Deciding for yourself today to be the pillar in the house of God, just like being part of the body of Christ that no one can live without.

Labels: Pillar in the House of God

Today was talking to a long-time church plus net friend, Andrew.

It seemed like a gal has been using his nick Androne to post nasty tag in his friend's blog.

Today he linked me back but warned me against the gal.

The gal caused people to go his blog and accused CHC for being a "cult".

At first I was thinking of checking out this gal through msn but in the end, I forgot about it for this girl got too many msn addresses.

Created them to go pestered my friend.

Reminded me of an old time incident.

Things gonna out of hands and all my friend can do is to ask people removed his link or to ban the gal.

Anyone of you guys out there if ever see someone with the nick Androne in my tag, please kindly don't think it is my friend.

Labels: Watch out

Thanks God for holiday.

Because of holiday, I can stay up late to...

Copy my 4 months worth of CG and Svc sermons, do my bible reading for Exodus, Mark and Luke, to tidy my room and also to visit my aunt with my family and then to spend time with them for lunch and dinner tomorrow.

Seem busy, yet look fulfilling.

After dinner still can go visit a new friend.

These are the things I need to do, things that can't be afford to postpone.

And like what Pearly, Lexx and I agreed, we got to start the Spiritual-Filled Believers' book before we are crushed by it when the assignment been passed down for us.

I'm awaiting for a fulfilling day!

Labels: Awaiting